It’s the first day of Ramadan, and there are about 10 minutes to go until we break fast. My mum, aunt, sister and I rush frantically up and down our flat bringing in plates, cutlery, and most importantly the food. My brother then comes into the kitchen brings in the samosas’s and a bottle of Pepsi and sits back down to finish watching the Liverpool match. We all sit round the table waiting for the adhan, and then furiously tuck in all the dishes whilst commenting on how the first day has been. We finish, and mum instantly tells me and my sister to start collecting all the plates and left-over food.

My little sister then begins her usual Ramadan argument. She protests that if my brother got up as well we’ll be able to finish tidying up quickly, and be able to rest and watch TV. ‘Let him carry on watching the game’ says my mother, ‘this is the woman’s job to do’. This is how it has been every Ramadan, and for the past 19 years of my life. The only difference this Ramadan was that I wasn’t going to take part in the yearly argument which always reached the same verdict. Why?

Since starting university last September, and meeting new friends my thinking of the whole equality regarding boys and girls has changed. I used to be adamant that it was wrong to have any differences between boys and girls no matter what the situation was. I and a close friend of mine always used to share our ideas and our own experiences, promising each other and ourselves that we would never fall trap to the ways of our parents. But since joining university and partaking in such discussions, I now realise how narrow-minded and how one-sided my opinions and arguments really were. Now I am able to see the other side of the debate by acknowledging the society we live in, its culture, and the media.

Theoretically we’ve always been taught by society and the work force that there should always be equality between males and females, however in reality it can never exist even in mundane tasks such as shopping and manual labour. One prime example that I can actually admit from my own experiences is when it comes to tasks such as moving furniture, or repair work. My sister and I always tend to leave those jobs up to my brother, however looking at it from his point of view we wouldn’t really consider it as being sexist when he’s doing them. This is mainly because we understand that since he’s the male it’s his job to do the more physical errands, whereas ours would be the simple tasks. I then realised that people, including myself, seemed to pick and choose when they wanted to consider equal rights, including the issue of curfews.

I then started to read between the lines of certain things the media would target, such as the issue of rape. What I noticed was that they failed to address when there was a male victim. There are many myths about male rapes such as men cannot be sexually assaulted, that only gay men are sexually assaulted, or that an adult male cannot be raped by a woman. In fact statistics from the U.S have shown that there are far more male rapes every day in prisons alone, than there are rapes of all females in the USA.

Another important issue addressed by the media which has not been targeted as much is the hidden side of domestic violence - when women abuse their own men. For a man to be on the receiving end of domestic violence is frequently seen as a comic situation, and sadly this adds to the unwillingness men have to come forward and speak out about their traumas. But it happens all the same. The humiliation in-conjunction with this abuse makes it just as hard for men to break free and seek help.

I also began to look at the ideology of equality for males and females within governments. Margaret Thatcher was the first woman to be in power in Britain from 1979-1990. However 16 years later, no other female MP has managed to reach the same position as the former prime minister. It seems that even the government has created boundaries between males and females, as high positions in parliament are mainly given to males such as Gordon Brown or Tony Blair.

Historically, it has always been known that the females were the ones to nurture their young and cook the food, whilst the males went out and hunted for food. It seems then that perhaps these differences have been embedded in our forefathers- differences which may never change.

Taking all of these views into consideration I now believe that despite my own, and my little sisters efforts to change the pattern in our own household, the media, the government, and the entire world and its history must also change to accommodate true equality.  Unfortunately the battle for equality seems to be easier said than done as it will most likely be a long and overwhelming battle, as centuries and centuries of teachings must be abandoned in order to adopt a new wave of thinking. So I wonder if true equality can thrive in future generations considering the inherent differences in the nature and socialization of both sexes.  And I wonder if our battle for equality will continue to be a one-sided, and perhaps misplaced, argument.  

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